Forgiving without forgetting



Forgiving without forgetting

Forgiving without forgetting

Joshua Pagé
Published on August 7th, 2009
Published on November 3rd, 2009
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Diane Lavoie used to hate the man responsible for her daughter's death.

Not any more.

Topics :
Daily Herald

Diane Lavoie used to hate the man responsible for her daughter's death.

Not any more.

"I have forgiven him, but I'll never forget what he's done to our family," said Lavoie of Dale Smith after his parole hearing.

Smith, 21, was denied parole Thursday.

He had previously pleaded guilty to a charge of dangerous driving causing death.

The victim was his ex-girlfriend, 17-year-old Jocelynn Lavoie.

Hating Smith took a lot of energy from Diane and it began to affect her family.

"I couldn't hate him any longer because it was taking too much out of me and it was ruining my family, so I had to come to terms with that and I have," she said.

Diane said she felt his apology at the hearing lacked emotion.

"It was just like he was reading it from a piece of paper. It was no emotion. There was just no emotion behind anything today," said Diane.

For more on this story, and for a complete story on the hearing itself, see Friday's Daily Herald.

Comments

  • Username
    Diane
    - November 20th, 2009 at 02:13:37

    I would like to thank everyone for their support, that is what helped my family and me get through this. Please don't misunderstand me, I believe he should stay in jail until he can prove to society that he has changed. What we saw the other day proved that he hasn't. He still needs a lot of programs before he will be ready to come back into society. The programs in the pen are there to help him if he accepts the help. I have forgiven him but he isn't a kid, he is a man. Until he respects himself he will never respect others. Thank you so much for all your support. it was much needed.

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  • Username
    dipsy
    - November 20th, 2009 at 00:05:22

    I hope that after forgiving him you are able to move on and let your heart heal. I hope that once he is finished serving his sentence he can prove himself worthy of your forgiveness and somehow try to take this tragedy and maybe help others or prevent another tragedy from happening through education. God bless you and your family, you're in my prayers.

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  • Username
    shawna
    - November 19th, 2009 at 15:16:27

    i think dale needs to stay where he is . with his driving record how many more lives is he gonna take when and if he ever gets his license back which i think he should'nt . he had been warned more then once about it by the police to slow down . i feel so bad diane and family about all this to keep it going so long

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  • Username
    ms. B
    - November 19th, 2009 at 11:00:16

    I totally agree with you. Ed. Heartfelt sympathies to the family and friends.

    Submit a Comment

  • Username
    T
    - November 19th, 2009 at 02:32:08

    I think its important for the family to forgive this kid......which is exactly what he was. Brains do not reach their growth til21.My point is,this kid made a real bad choice but he isnt evil unlike other ppl......our justice system makes me want to slash my own wrists cuz no one will ever learn anything in our current justice system......as ppl were mentioning with the woman whose drunk driving killed ppl and after three times,wow....she is out after less than two years.This is beyond disgusting.I am ashamed of our justice system.

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  • Username
    shawna
    - November 18th, 2009 at 21:57:11

    dear diane and family . i am so sorry to hear that this keeps dragging on and on for you all. i think he needs to stay in the pen where he can get the help to if he so desires. with his driving record how many more people is he gonna kill besides jocelynn? he oviously has no remorse to what happened that night . message me on face book if you wanna talk more . i am here for you

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  • Username
    Jerry
    - November 18th, 2009 at 21:17:51

    Diane Lavoie is a much better person than I. I have hated people for a long, long time that have done very much less to me than than steal the life of a family member. Being that Smith had previous driving convictions and never learned a lesson makes this a murder not an accident. Diane is correct that hate in your heart hurts you and those around you but it takes a special person to react like Diane. We as a community must never let Smith forget what he has done. I have never met the Lavoie family but may God bless Diane and the rest of the family.

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  • Username
    Barb
    - November 18th, 2009 at 17:08:09

    my heart goes out to you and your family for such a terrible loss. THANK-YOU for finding the courage and strength to forgive this young man...it took a much bigger person to forgive than to continue hating.
    i was in a somewhat similar situation a few years back and i, too chose to forgive. i have never looked back and am a much happier and content person today.
    i chose the road less travelled and believe me it was rocky at times but now i see the importance of going the long way around. in order to heal you must go through it...not around it.
    i am very proud of you! good luck in your journey...

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  • Username
    Ed lives
    - November 18th, 2009 at 16:51:38

    Youre an incredibly magnanimous person Diane Lavoie to forgive someone for the magnitude of devastation that this immature person they call Dale Smith has caused. I for one could never forgive anyone thats has in all probability taken your heart and soul. Does a person like Dale Smith and this situation deserve a second chance in life? (Maybe)But he should have been punished to the full extent of the Law, But in this sorry a**county we fall short of making this happen. We let murderers, & Pedophiles, off the hook with no real punishment .Will this change? (I think not) Do I blame people for making mistakes in life? NO But by god they should pay for them!

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