Frustrations & Benefits

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There always comes a moment when your frustrations outweigh your benefits in any given situation.  This could have to do with relationships or careers or vehicles ... in any case it can be a sad turn of events, or a new beginning.

Relationships have that turning point when the 50-50 point reaches 90-10, or even worse. When you are frustrated and upset 90 per cent of the time, and content 10 per cent of the time you know the scales have tipped, the time has come, the lesson learned and “move on.” Relationships are funny things though, and oftentimes this tipping point spurs a new set of feelings. You remember all the good times, you miss each other and you resolve to become a better person, if not for each other than for your future new relationships.

Careers sometimes have this tipping point as well. Your 50-50 isn’t quite the same here, as more often than not you chose your job based on the possible paycheque — not the job description and day to day duties. Supporting a family sometimes means sucking up and taking on something you don’t like just to get through. I’ve been very lucky that my day to day duties keep me interested and happy, so my 50-50 is pretty good.  My last job/career/paycheque was a store manager at a coffee shop. It had its perks (pun intended) and it had its downfalls, like anywhere else. My favourite memories though are of the employees … as for me, it’s not so much what you do, but who you do it with that counts. And of course, there was the free coffee. 

My partner recently started a new career. This meant back to school, back to “school” wages and a completely different set of day to day duties for him. He loves it, and I admire him for his determination to learn an entirely different career, to be able to provide better stability for his family. His previous career could leave us with a layoff slip on a moment’s notice, so this was a great turn of events, and a new beginning.

A frustration for me was my “rush rush” attitude … and it didn’t seem to provide me with any tangible benefits. I’d hurry up to get out the door with my children, or I’d hurry up to get through traffic, or I’d hurry into the grocery for supper … And it’s not as though I’m going to get there any quicker, but definitely a little more stressed out. I’ve decided the benefits don’t justify this anymore. If my children are late for school, so be it, maybe I’ll avoid having a traffic accident if I drive at a decent speed. If I’m stuck in traffic, so be it, I’ll sing along to my new ‘80s mix CD and just wait patiently. If I haven’t thought ahead for supper and need to go to the grocery before home, so be it, I’ll take my time in the grocery and make sure it is a healthy meal I am putting together, instead of a rushed one. 

It’s easy enough to push aside the bad to find something good, but some days that’s easier said than done.

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